I was in my store room back in early December pulling out some Christmas decorations and I came across this plaque that my mom had given me last year when I spent some time with them. It wasn’t until I was putting away those same Christmas decorations that I took a moment to really look at and read the plaque.
On the back, mom had written when she had received it and who gave it to her. I had given her this as a gift for Christmas when I was 12. Did I go to the religious articles “store” at church to buy it? Was I trying to send some weird message of “stop and smell the roses” to her?
The irony of the whole thing for me is that I feel like this plaque speaks to me now. I see god’s beauty in the flowers and the open sky, in the birds I spend time with and in the animals I see every day.
Why did my mom return her gift to me? Well, she has been progressively downsizing her life for about the last ten years. Last year she gave back things to each of us that she had kept for years; artwork, special gifts and even some souvenirs.
When most of her grandchildren were small, sending photographs via snail mail was still a thing. Mom had received doubles of many of the photos that we had taken of our children. She has been returning most of those photos back so that those doubles can be given to the appropriate grandchild and we can keep our originals. I have also been taking home some older photos of my parents writing notes on the back as to who is in the photo and when it was taken. Sometimes a good story gets told when you come across an interesting photo.
Another thing my mom has been doing is asking family members that come to visit if there is anything in their house that they might want down the road. She either puts a small note on or under it or writes it down in a notebook. My last visit home I mentioned wanting the ceramic frog that has always sat beside the sink with a ball of steel wool in it.
Mom has had joint issues and doesn’t wear rings anymore. She has given or designated most of her jewellery to daughters or grand daughters. Doing this prompted stories about where the jewellery came from or about the job she had working at a jewelers in Edmonton.
I am pretty sure any family member that wanted one of my grandma’s afghans has gotten at least one. Other doilies or tablecloths are marked with the names of who showed interest.
I have much of mom’s leftover knitting yarn and bits and pieces of sewing material. She realizes she isn’t doing that much of either anymore. Other crafty things have been boxed up and donated.
Even canning jars have been purged. Mom is keeping just enough for what she currently still cans. When there was eight of us living at home, there was a lot of different things being canned. Now that it is only the two of them, they don’t need as much.
I appreciate the effort being made to downsize their life and passing on or getting rid of things that they are no longer using. Doing it now allows for memories to be shared and stories to be told. I hope, when the time comes, that I will be willing to not hang on to stuff; that I will realize that it is ok to live a more simplistic life.
And there is still too much left!